goatwhisperer3

Active Member
Jul 22, 2017
646
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Wasn't this same story done before except with a female MC?
most storys were done before...especially when it comes up to ren'py demos to get pledges. Female MC with such "joining underworld" story...most recent i can think of is "Wet beginning", but im not up to date to the latest single-digit minute demos cause i dont play them anymore ( ' - ')
 

fauxplayer

Engaged Member
Uploader
Donor
May 28, 2017
2,278
13,057
I obviously know that all devs want their games to be successful, and this guy has other goals first... BUT it's always a red flag to me when a new dev mentions hiring people or build a team.
Agreed. I am a patron of several games, but I am very reluctant to contribute to a game where the dev seems to be dependent on unrealistic goals rather than humbly making the game they want to make and hoping people simply like it and want to help. Making it clear you are asking for money is an easy way to not make money. If subsequent updates improve the quality of the renders and maintain the intriguing plot, I might contribute because I like to patronize games that I enjoy. But I never patronize games that overtly beg for patrons. I didn't notice his patron tiers. @Izirider should consider more realistic short-term goals that will build a core base of low-tier patrons and build from there. Courting high-tier patrons from the beginning (almost) never works.
 
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User_32285

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Guest
queen of crime or something if were thinking of the same title
 

Zippity

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Respected User
Nov 16, 2017
1,393
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This VN/Game has minors in it, you even get that as text when one of the characters walks into a room with a young boy on a couch... 2 of the minors actually try to watch the girls mother and boys father having sex... The same girl was about to remove her shirt to show the boy her flat breasts when she was interrupted... There is no doubt in my mind they were meant to be minors...

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PoEbalu

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Apr 27, 2017
1,003
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This VN/Game has minors in it, you even get that as text when one of the characters walks into a room with a young boy on a couch... 2 of the minors actually try to watch the girls mother and boys father having sex... The same girl was about to remove her shirt to show the boy her flat breasts when she was interrupted... There is no doubt in my mind they were meant to be minors...

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none of them are involved in any sexual acts,so what's your problem.
 

Hyped

Member
Jan 14, 2018
408
1,277
This is a decent looking game. Love the female models, and I'm sure the production values will improve over time.
Overall, good job dev.
 
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Izirider

Member
Game Developer
Sep 11, 2017
162
1,270
First of all, thanks for the comments. Secondly:

End of demo
There will be NO ********** in this story. I knew this was a dangerous part. I did a lot of work with it, I had to be very careful. The scene was completed in several versions, I was striving not to cross the line by accident. Nevertheless, for the last moment, I was thinking of delete it. But I felt this scenes important, because it shows the difference between the twins, their habit, and shows the relationship between the three main characters. But in the next chapters everybody gets adult. Children are not involved in sexual activity. There will be no more kids in the story.

Goals
The situation is that I set it up at the last minute. I'm not naive, I know this is not really game development. And also that I will not get $ 5000. I just set up these goals because I've seen them elsewhere. For me, this whole community support is extremely new. But that is why I'm glad you say so, so I can learn that, and I've modified the goals.

Writing
You may not believe it then, but I'm actually a writer. I have written many short stories, and two of my novels are at the publisher. But you're right, there are problems with the text. There are several reasons for this.
First, My english is rusty. As a journalist, I read and listening to english every day. But I did not speak or write english in eleven years. I try to develop myself in this field. And I want to get involved with someone who knows better in english.
Second, it is difficult to translate the hungarian text into english. Hungarian is a very hard but beautiful language. But that is why it is difficult to translate. Many content is lost.
Third, I left my comfort zone. I've been writing stories for twenty-one years, my style has developed. Now I'm trying to translate it into another language and (for me) a new medium. A visual novel must be written differently than a novel. This is also difficult for me now, but I'm trying to evolve.

The End
I want to finish this game. It's important for me to tell a story. You have no reason to believe me, but for me this is more important than money. Of course I would like to earn money with the game, this is not a secret. But I want to tell a story to you, while for me this is an interesting experiment. A new experience. I like to try myself in new things.
I'm not thinking about a new game yet. For now, this one is enough. If in the end I like this thing, and you're also curious about stories from me, then maybe I'm into a new game. But for now my only priority is the Rise of the Crime Lord.
Of course I know, you have no reason to believe me. The only proof will be the true end of the game.
 

Izirider

Member
Game Developer
Sep 11, 2017
162
1,270
No. I was thinking about it, but I decided not to deal with this topic in this game.
 

El bacca Del Chew

Well-Known Member
Apr 3, 2017
1,813
4,602
Hungarian is a very hard but beautiful language
It is !
Off topic: Once a beautiful girl talked to my friends and I with a smooth and such a musical sentence, which was translate later by one of the native among us:
"ok now, you are drunk stupids tourists, it's late, you are too noisy and i'm tired, get out of my restaurant!! "

haha, she was pretty so no grudges and we were stupids students tourists :)
 
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Zippity

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Nov 16, 2017
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none of them are involved in any sexual acts,so what's your problem.
Well let's see, they tried to watch their parents having sex, the youngest looking girl was about to take her shirt off to show her flat breasts to the boy... They talked about having sex with each others parents... Add all that up, along with the inclusion of that text I posted before... Penetration does not need to occur for it to still insinuate sexual and/or erotic material involving under aged minors...
 

PoEbalu

Well-Known Member
Apr 27, 2017
1,003
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it's pretty clear what the author has planned with the children
not really...
tried to watch their parents having sex
so ? that's what kids do in real life,they stick their noses where it doesnt belong.
i undersntad,that not everyone were a kid,and was grown in vats,but i was.
youngest looking girl was about to take her shirt off to show her flat breasts to the boy
really ? ever heard of "show me your wewe and i'll show you mine" ? you guess it right...that what kids do.
They talked about having sex with each others parents
that's the only thing that trigger any alarm,but again...that's because they are kids and talk shit. we'll see if that will have any following up or not.
 

Zippity

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Respected User
Nov 16, 2017
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not really...

so ? that's what kids do in real life,they stick their noses where it doesnt belong.
i undersntad,that not everyone were a kid,and was grown in vats,but i was.

really ? ever heard of "show me your wewe and i'll show you mine" ? you guess it right...that what kids do.

that's the only thing that trigger any alarm,but again...that's because they are kids and talk shit. we'll see if that will have any following up or not.
It still insinuates it in a porn game... In any case, it's a moot point as the author just claimed he plans to remove them entirely, thank goodness... You can go back to your being offended at me being offended, have a spectacular day...
 

myuhinny

Devoted Member
Sep 7, 2017
8,364
6,348
@

I believe Ozygator is probably referring to mobster queen. Where you play a female protagonist who's father is killed and her and her brother take over the business.
 
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