That was great! Good story, sexy sex, sometimes cute, sometimes hot, decent renders, good animations, very sexy writing. The pace is fast, sometimes too fast, it's not an award winning novel, but for an H game it's great.
The poor bits: Spelling, clearly not native English, but whatever, that's not what breaks a story. And the misattributions. There are too many lines from the wrong character. That's sloppy. But again, not breaking.
All in all, great, definitely recommend. I've even kept the files so I can replay some scenes soon.