Ren'Py Rogue-like: Evolution [v1.51f] [Oni]

[Urowi]

View attachment 108146
It seems like everyone has only been praising you and not providing any constructive criticism for this new character and while I more or less agree with the praise (workout clothes look great) I also feel like I have to say something. Do you see the problem with the way you've drawn her? She doesn't fit in with the rest of the game. The lines are too harsh, her face lacks detail and expressiveness. Ultimately less polished in general. Visually she's just not as vibrant as the other girls and you can tell by this picture how she clearly stands out disregarding the background of course.

I was waiting to see more update pics because I thought the body was a work in progress as it was definitely getting better but now that you've moved on to clothes I'm wondering if this is it?

Thank you! I felt the same way but didn't want to say anything because of the hard work they've put into this, didn't want to come of sounding like a dick. The way you phrased it was perfect

 

[Echo-128]

not providing any constructive criticism for this new character

I actually like the artwork. I think the workout gear looks great!

But do I have a crazy suggestion:
Instead of being a character that now shows up in the game, perhaps Mystique could be more of a test-bed for future character additions. In other words, if you (the modders) have unfinished artwork or dialog for a character that you might like to introduce in some future update -- instead, use Mystique to allow us a sneak preview of that character in game.

So, you have unfinished Jean Grey artwork?
Psylocke?
Storm?
Instead of showing us still images of the character, allow the players to interact with her (Mystique trying out a new disguise) in a single scene. That way, we can provide some feedback about the art/dialog before you've gone to all the work of making a "finished" character.

Later, once that character is introduced in the game, Mystique will explain that its "too dangerous" to try out that look now that the real Jean Grey (or whomever) is around. But, would you like me to try on another disguise for you?

 

[winter0s]

I'll take these under consideration...

Hey man, I just want to make it clear that the stuff I critiqued don't necessarily mean your art falls short or that it's not great. The only thing holding it back is that your style is slightly different than Oni's. You work is pretty awesome, more than what any of us could accomplish. Keep up the good work!

PS - Good art comes from drinking good Scotch or Irish whiskey. JD wont help you much!

 

[CodeMonkey]

I'll take these under consideration, there's an underlying technical issue with the line weight that probably won't be fixed but there are stylistic differences that I can address. Straight up, Oni likes more shading per square unit than I do, and his shadows are in higher contrast. Her whole face probably seems a little off because it's transposed from a separate file that is at a wildly different resolution, plus Mystique seemed to have a much more angular face but I can take another pass at it. But if the general designs are good it's not like I can't go back in and revise stuff.

I have, in the face of these criticisms, drank a bottle of Jack Daniels and stabbed myself in the hand. Read about it on my LiveJournal where you can find the link to a gimmiedatcash.org to cover my medical expenses...and more Jack Daniels.

you are right, the Villians were intentionally done with harsher angles in the face, there's an artistic/psychological reason to do it that way but you can soften the edge, btw what software are you using to do this? cause there are a couple of good drawing softwares that are free and are not gimp or PS because they are legitimately dedicated to drawing & painting rather then image manipulation. as far as the major differences, there are more detail lines and shadows but otherwise it's fairly accurate to Mystiques most notable "human" character in the series for the first seasion minus the hair change but eh she looks less prudish this way. you are doing a good job.

 

[Olive_Drab]

When I said: "I'll take these under consideration...", I was being quite literal. Critique and feedback are an important tool in improving art. I mean, fuck all y'all haters, you just don't understand mah AAAARRRRRRT!

I use gimp 2.8, mostly because I'm familiar with it and I really like how the vector tool functions, but I really don't ever use a lot of the image/photo manipulation stuff. Plus I don't have a cintiq or pad or whatever, I use-a-da mouse!

Maybe I should use-a-da spellcheck.

 

[j3wed]

What's oni's stand to the modding now since it has increased quite much?
Also, i don't know who that 4th character is, but she looks hideous as hell and the drawing of her is bad and heavily copied from rogue.

 

[Ahhjksio]

Hey man, I just want to make it clear that the stuff I critiqued don't necessarily mean your art falls short or that it's not great. The only thing holding it back is that your style is slightly different than Oni's. You work is pretty awesome, more than what any of us could accomplish. Keep up the good work!

"more than what any of us could accomplish."
Well that's pretty rude, speak for yourself.

When I said: "I'll take these under consideration...", I was being quite literal. Critique and feedback are an important tool in improving art

Yeah! There's also something to be said about the negative effects of receiving only positive feedback with everything you do. I don't at all mean to discourage you from contributing Olive but you seem to take it pretty well. I'm not gonna lie and say its GREAT or hits the mark because like I said I think there's things you can change that will make it great and I'm looking forward to it.

 

[Olive_Drab]

*draws new image from scratch*
"hideous, heavily copied from rogue"

If this is constructive criticism, I have no idea what you're building.

Anyways, here's a quick tweak I did: changed skin tone, increased shading amount to enhance detail in physique (Mystique physique, lol) and contrasting colors, softened jawline and made face less angular in general. Put her in a bedroom so it wasn't such an eyesore; I know pastel's not for everyone.

Smurf style:

 

[mastaczajnik]

Her forehead is too low...

 

[Olive_Drab]

Her forehead is too low...

You mean her hairline is too high?

I see it now, I think I dropped the layer with the hair in the wrong spot. You do mean the Mystique version right?

 

[MK78]

*draws new image from scratch*
"hideous, heavily copied from rogue"

If this is constructive criticism, I have no idea what you're building.

Anyways, here's a quick tweak I did: changed skin tone, increased shading amount to enhance detail in physique (Mystique physique, lol) and contrasting colors, softened jawline and made face less angular in general. Put her in a bedroom so it wasn't such an eyesore; I know pastel's not for everyone.
View attachment 108456
Smurf style:
View attachment 108471

Well i like it, i think he meant the Mystique Version that is in the Game at the moment wich had the Rogue Body, cause the new Drawings are not the same anymore.
Im looking forward to have the new one in Game.

 

[winter0s]

Well that's pretty rude, speak for yourself.

Well I meant to type "many"...sorry if that typo riled you up...

 

[Thatguy]

@Olive_Drab you plan on adding that little forehead ornament as an optional thing?

@RanchFTW Personal preference but wouldn't want to look like Leech even if Evolution's version of him was tame in comparison to other versions.

 

[mastaczajnik]

You mean her hairline is too high?

I see it now, I think I dropped the layer with the hair in the wrong spot. You do mean the Mystique version right?

No, I ment the human form, blue form looks realy good.

 

[Milkman69]

*draws new image from scratch*
"hideous, heavily copied from rogue"

If this is constructive criticism, I have no idea what you're building.

Anyways, here's a quick tweak I did: changed skin tone, increased shading amount to enhance detail in physique (Mystique physique, lol) and contrasting colors, softened jawline and made face less angular in general. Put her in a bedroom so it wasn't such an eyesore; I know pastel's not for everyone.
View attachment 108456
Smurf style:
View attachment 108471

She's looking better but yeah her face is still too masculine. Something a bit more like this might help?

Even then it's probably best to make her even more feminine than that. As was mentioned by someone before, the show sorta intentionally give the villains a harsher style to evoke a diffrent psychological response from the audience. But for a porn game it's better to make her more conventionally attractive.

You're aiming for your audience to want to fuck her, rather than wanting to see her get punched. Unlike what the show's original artists intended.

 

[Echo-128]

Under Rogue's leveling menu you're given the option of allowing her "to permanently copy one other mutant ability..."
How is this used?
Or is this a placeholder for a future update?

- Thanks in advance

 

[Thatguy]

Probably a place holder. though could make for some interesting sex.

 

[MK78]

Even then it's probably best to make her even more feminine than that. As was mentioned by someone before, the show sorta intentionally give the villains a harsher style to evoke a diffrent psychological response from the audience. But for a porn game it's better to make her more conventionally attractive.

You're aiming for your audience to want to fuck her, rather than wanting to see her get punched. Unlike what the show's original artists intended.

And that is an other example why for me the 90's version of the X-Men in general are the cooler ones!

Want another one? Ok, ok

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Love it!:heartcoveredeyes:

 

[Olive_Drab]

I don't know, I think I liked the "Wolverine and the X-Men" version the most.

Anyway, here's revisions.
I know the chin was an issue for some, so I fixed that:


Here's the versions I tossed in favor of Mystiqimus Prime:

Fixed hairline for both, reduced jaw width and angle, redrew shadows to soften face and match new hair; gave Raven a barrette to keep her bangs out of her eyes and a baguette to keep the pangs (of hunger) out of her stomach.

I think the lips might be giving people some trouble too, they'll be resized when I draw the mouth set though.

 

[yurihope]

I don't know, I think I liked the "Wolverine and the X-Men" version the most.

Anyway, here's revisions.
I know the chin was an issue for some, so I fixed that:
View attachment 108602

Here's the versions I tossed in favor of Mystiqimus Prime:
View attachment 108598 View attachment 108599
Fixed hairline for both, reduced jaw width and angle, redrew shadows to soften face and match new hair; gave Raven a barrette to keep her bangs out of her eyes and a baguette to keep the pangs (of hunger) out of her stomach.

I think the lips might be giving people some trouble too, they'll be resized when I draw the mouth set though.

Just my opinion but I think her nose should be less "squary".
Otherwise I think she's looks pretty nice.