VN Ren'Py Sophie: The Girl from the Zone [v0|3.00] [DavyCroquette]

4.10 star(s) 15 Votes
Discussion Reviews (15)
G

Gorainu

Newbie
Apr 24, 2021
46
136
DavyCroquette said:
The English translation isn't too bad?
Click to expand...
First minute in the game.

you-"How are you?"
girl-"yes"

....


I like girls saying yes to me but there is still a limit. ^^

The whole relationships page is untranslated. You should either MTL from french or run your english through prowrittingAid or chatGpt to get rid of most common mistakes (there were a lot of them. Reading the story was a chore. I stopped at the cruise boat)

In the end, poor translation is fine (I believe we've all played some MTL or poorly translated japaneses games), you have a bigger issue at hand: art. Portraits looks like a mismatch of DALL-E generated art, there are no 18+renders or scenes. Story is not very interresting nor engaging.

I'm not sure what you are going for here. If it is a simple VN you'll need to work more on the writting. If it is an adult game, I'd expect more adult content. (good porn art makes one way more lenient with story and translation mishaps ^^)

Good luck with your game.
 
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Saint Blackmoor

Saint Blackmoor

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Oct 26, 2017
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Gorainu said:
In the options. Top right, you'll get to choose between français or Anglais (English).
Click to expand...
Before starting the game, I had put an opacity mod in, and it deleted the French/English choice. :cautious:

Thanks for the help.
 
Last edited:
DavyCroquette

DavyCroquette

Member
Game Developer
Feb 17, 2022
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705
Gorainu said:
In the end, poor translation is fine (I believe we've all played some MTL or poorly translated japaneses games), you have a bigger issue at hand: art.
Click to expand...
Up until Chapter 4, I had a shitty rendering computer and it was my first images.
 
D

Deleted member 5606666

Member
Dec 15, 2022
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Probably someone done that before:

I just took the french and threw it in google translate, the result was fine:


"In 2052, a mysterious virus spread. You live your almost quiet little life miles from your hometown, until you meet this girl." Be careful, each of your choices will have consequences in the more or less long term and more or less serious on the 'history."


Please replace the intro text by that sentence, no need for bad english anymore, if you write good french, google will be your friend. If you don't like google, use deepl.com, it gives a bit of a different translation, also fine...
 
DavyCroquette

DavyCroquette

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Feb 17, 2022
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705
shadow_steve3395 said:
Holà, merci pour le jeu, sérieux j'ai bien kiffé, et bon courage à toi pour tout ça ! Tellement hâte d'avoir la suite (y)
Click to expand...
Merci beaucoup, ça fait plaisir ! La traduction anglaise est peut-être approximative, mais j'ai confiance à la version française :D
Les visuels du début sont sûrement étranges, car j'ai commencé le projet par des dessins pour finalement passer à la 3D. Et comme tu as pu voir, j'ai mis 2 à 3 chapitres avant de maîtriser la 3D. lol
---
Thank you very much, it's nice! The English translation may be approximate, but I trust the French version :D
The visuals at the beginning are surely strange, because I started the project with drawings and finally moved to 3D. And as you could see, I took 2 to 3 chapters before mastering 3D. lol
 
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vogelbeest

vogelbeest

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Jan 9, 2021
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Seems letting Vicky go up the stairs first, results in her following you and vice versa... (at least in the English version)
The relationship menu isn't translated... The ending isn't either (save your progression here bla bla)
But it's an interesting story, pretty fast paced too and the current ending, although not a real cliffhanger, seems an opening to several possible scenarios.... Needs a proof reader to get the him/her right a couple times but so far it's not bad overall...
Probably some slightly less scarred MC would help too.. Anyway, good luck Dev!
 
Vechernyaya

Vechernyaya

Newbie
Sep 12, 2018
61
675
The writing is definitely not good and sometime make no sense, and it's not because of the translation, it's not better in french.
Et j'aime pas qu'un jeu me tutoie comme ça.

Sophie - [...] mais tu as l'air cool.
MC - Je t'avoue qu'il m'arrive de ne pas être quelqu'un de bien... Mais... Tu as l'air cool aussi,
Et la j'ai de nouveau un choix "Carrément ! oui !" "quand ?" "Tu me dragues ?"

Il manque un bout ? Ça n'a aucun sens. Et c'est pareil en anglais :

Sophie - [...] but you seem cool.
MC - I confess that sometime I'm not a good persone... but... You look cool too,
And then, I need to choose again "Definitely ! Yes !" "When ?" "Are you hitting on me ?"

It doesn't make any sense, the translation is good, the problem is the writing.
 
Last edited:
DavyCroquette

DavyCroquette

Member
Game Developer
Feb 17, 2022
260
705
Myrionyma said:
The writing is definitely not good and sometime make no sense, and it's not because of the translation, it's not better in french.
Et j'aime pas qu'un jeu me tutoie comme ça.

Sophie - [...] mais tu as l'air cool.
MC - Je t'avoue qu'il m'arrive de ne pas être quelqu'un de bien... Mais... Tu as l'air cool aussi,
Et la j'ai de nouveau un choix "Carrément ! oui !" "quand ?" "Tu me dragues ?"

Il manque un bout ? Ça n'a aucun sens. Et c'est pareil en anglais :

Sophie - [...] but you seem cool.
MC - I confess that sometime I'm not a good persone... but... You look cool too,
And then, I need to choose again "Definitely ! Yes !" "When ?" "Are you hitting on me ?"

It doesn't make any sense, the translation is good, the problem is the writing.
Click to expand...
It's the beginning of the story, there are a lot of choices of direction and to fall back into the main line, it was not easy. But I agree, I have to review this passage.
 
Ghost''

Ghost''

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Mar 17, 2021
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La Fille de la Zone [v1.762]


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COOLMASTER

Member
Nov 12, 2019
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salut davy

hello davy

je vais tester ton jeux

I gona test your game

en image les rendues on l'aire bien a voir le game play

Lets see how game's works
 
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4.10 star(s) 15 Votes