VN Ren'Py Qeustions about my prototype version

Klauw1988

Member
Aug 23, 2020
169
217
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Hello everyone, i've been busy for a while with my own novel. But I never released anything, due the fact that I always find something to improve. Now I can finally show something that I have been working on.

It's a prototype (don't have a name for my novel yet) and it's ment for learing Ren'py. Also the text is place holder, English isn't my native language so expect error's. I will see if I can find someone in the future who can correct my error's. I will rewrite the whole text at some later point, now it feels to generic and repetitive.

I want to create a novel which aims at exhibitism and blackmail. It's about a ex FBI analyst named Livia, who was working on a case with her husband. After her husband died and received death threats, she was taken off the case and placed under witness protection. 19 years later, the FBI data base got hacked and she was forced to move out with her daughter again. This time she go lives in a place where her sister lives. Livia also starts a new job as a teacher, on a local school.

Her sister Cyrilla thinks that Livia is single for way to long. She thinks that Livia needs to find some fun and excitement in her life. Cyrilla is more of a daredevil, likes to mess around and tease people. While Livia is a shy and closed person.

All these aspects will be a main part of the story. I don't wanna spoil to much what I have in mind, but expect, sad, funny and exciting moments. I won't be forcing on hardcore sex, but more on teasing, blackmail, exhibitism, voyeurism and many other things.

My novel is in 4k right now, but later I will also release 1080p version. Due the fact that the 4k will be very big in GB's. The prototype of my novel contains 4 characters, Livia, Cyrilla, Lucas (the landlord) and Patrick (the landlords son). The novel will contain more novel's but some characters are still in development, including Livia's daughter, students, and many other characters. Some names are also placeholder, and can change in the future.

I'm also trying to find a balance between story telling and sandbox gameplay. This is my first novel and working with Ren'Py, so I can try my best to create a fun game with a little bit of freedom and choices.

"link removed"


Things I would like to know, how do you like the graphics? What do you think about the story? How does it look overal? Do you have any tips? And so on. I'm also trying to get the best renders, but I have to do all the lighting by hand for each render. Also all the characters are developed by myself.

Have fun!


Don't go to hard on me, or else Cyrilla will beat you up. :ROFLMAO:

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trex999999

Newbie
Nov 11, 2019
50
187
By the description I don't think that the genres are my cup of tea, but the girls are cute. Good luck on your VN, man!
 

Eagle1900

Engaged Member
Oct 7, 2022
3,316
17,268
This time she go lives in a place where her sister lives.
hello I read the story of your project and noticed this inconsistency.
Don't you also find that if a woman is placed under strict surveillance, it is not the case to go and live in her sister's house? I think it's impossible, because relatives' houses are the first to visit those who could harm them... in fact, even relatives often move them to secret places to avoid retaliation.
however, besides this thing that you will have to review, I don't think there is anything wrong, and I wish you the best of luck with your project. :cool:
 

Klauw1988

Member
Aug 23, 2020
169
217
hello I read the story of your project and noticed this inconsistency.
Don't you also find that if a woman is placed under strict surveillance, it is not the case to go and live in her sister's house? I think it's impossible, because relatives' houses are the first to visit those who could harm them... in fact, even relatives often move them to secret places to avoid retaliation.
however, besides this thing that you will have to review, I don't think there is anything wrong, and I wish you the best of luck with your project. :cool:
Yeah, that's why I re-written the story. I don't want a classical divorce cliché why the lead protagonist and her daughter moved city. Thanks for your feedback, back to the drawing board.

Little bonus picture.

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