VN - Ren'Py - Abandoned - Locked Away [Ep. 3p2] [Bitter Strawman]

Complex and captivating story, the characters are nicely developped: some very strong personalities with or without their own [expressed for now] weaknesses. Nothing was boring, the game plays out in a well-thought out rythym, like watching a good film. The characters are all unique and attractive, but in completely different ways, catering for different tastes. Amazing work, well done 5/5.

the overview text and intro is really bad.
amnesiac dude, find himself in a hotel room and a girl wants him to pay rent.
a barista with problems, his solution, give me money and a job.
suddenly he is very sure about himself, knows where to go and what to say.
the obvious route would be to visit the hospital/police to look for his identity.

after that he is surrounded by girls, no males to see anywhere except for the "dream".
and more into the story more I understand the writer is very amateurish, its like a bad thriller
with people that acts stupid and illogical that of course will bite them in the ass later because of bad decisions.

CG is mediocre, theres animation but not smoothly done.
the story is bad and ruins it, but characters are well done, they have personalities. we could compare to a tv show with good actors but bad script. I give 2 stars for the characters, but it need improvement, especially the intro as its bad, and we know how important the intro is.

The description in the OP does the VN a huge disservice. What you get here is a surprisingly dark story that hook you in from the first sentence. The somber background music adds to the moody atmosphere making you fully immersed in it. The MC is an amnesiac stuck in the middle of an unknown city surrounded by people who all have their own agenda or problems. One thing leads to another and you are soon neck deep in the problems and politics that weave a tangled mess. Along the way you meet lots of beautiful yet mysterious women and some even have superpowers. This adds further wrinkles into the narrative making it go in unexpected directions which is perhaps one of the best qualities of the VN. You never know where it will go with each episode/update.The renders are crisp and clear with good framing angles without any weird poses that don't look awkward. I mentioned the music before and have to repeat that all the scenes have more or less perfect choices that set their tone very well.

Now with all my praise you might be wondering why I rated it 4 instead of 5. I would have rated it 4.5 but there's no option for that. The setting of the VN isn't adequately explained and all these powers exist without people commenting on them much which confused me a bit. Their origins and/or how common/uncommon are they should be expanded upon for the player so that they can adjust their mindset themselves accordingly. As this is a story-based VN first and foremost it was weird to see an unavoidable sex scene. I say this because upto the latest update (Ep 3 part 1) the player has complete control over who they do/don't sleep with otherwise.

If you haven't tried it then do some without delay because Bitter Strawman the developer is doing something different here that deserves to reach it's natural end without getting cut short. Sure, you've seen the things here a number of times but the way they've been combined and implemented are what makes it unique and worth your time.

The game has some motifs similar to Pine Falls and a couple of other games, which are popular on this site as well. This should make you understand whether the game is for you.
The choices are interesting in the story and the animations are spot on, I fully like the girls in the game and all of them are powerful in their own way, you will feel like you are not the is-all-ends-all MC like most other games offer you to be and that is good.
The game does very well what it wants to do and the story gets stronger as the game progresses. Can't wait for more.

In one word - Awesome! This is one of the best there is out there. It claims to have been inspired by a greatly appreciated artist, and honestly it lives by its inspiration...

Girls are GREAT! Plenty of choices, for every taste... Plot is awesome, staging is perfect, story unfolds nicely, branching is impressive and you WILL go for many playthroughs...

It got to my top 5, and I don't see it falling anytime soon. Really one of the best there are, and one I'm proud to support. If you were to try a new one and stumbled upon this, it's a no brainer. Go For It.

No complaints. Story is good and keeps me very interested, waiting for more. The characters eem cool as well as all the interesting abilities, and the renders are really good.

My only complaint is that there aren't more episodes yet! Jokes aside, looking forward to seeing more from this game. Hopefully the story can unravel a bit without making things too confusing or hard to follow.

Definitely worth trying this game.

If you read the brief synopsis and think this will be a Pine Falls or Under The Dome story rip-off, it definitely isn't. This VN is one of the few truly unique stories on this site.
As you'll learn in the first scenes of the game, the MC is "the right man in the wrong place..." making a difference.

This isn't a porn VN. It's an erotic sci-fi/fantasy mystery with:
* a well written story that is mysterious and intriguing;
* some very good (and hot) characters that are well defined with their own individual personalities and reactions;
* good sex scenes that fit with the story;
* an MC who isn't the typical sex-crazed adolescent with no brain, but is instead an intelligent, capable, although more than just a little confused, guy... "the right man".

The only detraction from this very enjoyable VN is the English script needs some polishing. Something a better translator could quickly achieve. It's not bad, you're not left wondering "WTF did that mean?", but you do have to think through some of the text and re-translate it in your head a bit.

Choices in this game have profound effects going forward, and it makes the story you play fairly divergent and with good replay value if you want to see different outcomes. Save often is the best advice here.
Some choices and their consequences seemed odd to me. They might be due to something being lost in the translation, or it might just be me being the bearer of little brain.

All up, this is a really fun ride. I'm very much looking forward to future installments.

Most adult game writing is bad because it exists only as an afterthought, as a way to rush to pornography as quickly as possible. You can almost hear the author's thoughts: "Who cares if it makes sense, let's get some renders of boobs on the screen!"

But this game is different. This is a high-concept science fiction story about an amnesiac protagonist trapped by mystical forces in a small town. He's surrounded by weirdness, corruption (in the political sense), and people with paranormal powers.

So you really notice that the writing is bad.

When the writing is just a way to get to the porn, you can ignore it. Skim it. But when it matters? When you're writing science fiction and trying to weave a mystery? It's the core of the game. It's important. You can't skim here, not if you want to understand anything that's going on.

So what's so bad? From a technical standpoint, the grammar is atrocious and the sentence structure is strange. I don't know anything about the dev, but my assumption is the english is not a first language. There are many, many typos and awkward word uses.

But story and character is where the real problems are. Our protagonist wakes up in a hotel room with no memory and just flies through some of the most obvious exposition dumping I've ever read. He's informed that he's trapped in a town, forever, for reasons. Instead of testing this, he goes out for coffee, eavesdrops, and decides to help a girl he's never met with three different problems she has in her life. (Oh, but really two, because she's both being blackmailed by the mayor of the town and by a loanshark - who she didn't actually go into debt with - over the same coffee shop. And she broke up her friend's relationship because her psychic powers told her to. What? What?!) Then, after this horseshit, the protagonist decides he didn't actually believe the bullshit earlier about being trapped in the town and finally tests it himself.

And this is just the first 5 minutes of the game. It's all like this. People don't act like people, they don't talk like people. There is no immersion with writing like this.

I'm not meaning to sound harsh, but let me be clear: If this was just any old game where you click for some porn, it would be fine. But when you're trying to craft a narrative you have to be better than this. No one, upon being told they're trapped by magic in a town, swallows that whole. Any reasonable person immediately tries to leave. No one sits down in a coffee shop and then decides to fix all the problems in a stranger's life. And what's more, that stranger doesn't accept the help of some random off the street with deeply personal problems.

All of these plot points can be justified with good writing and pacing, but that's just completely absent. A strong introduction to this setting and the characters would fix so many of the problems here. The dev needs to read some books in this genre, or maybe watch something like In The Mouth of Madness. Because right now this is just ridiculous.

On the positive side: renders are fine, animations are fine. Looks like choices will matter and will branch throughout the game, giving you multiple paths and distinct playthroughs. These parts of the game I really like; they show real promise, and a willingness to craft meaningful content that some players will never see, depending on their choices.

The dev isn't lazy. They just need a copy editor.

I think this is one of the most underrated games on this site. Its quality is great, both in the plot and in the renders.
It starts with a well-known premise (The protagonist can't leave the town for some strange reason) but the original thing is that instead of focusing on it, he worries about developing interactions with different characters, all very different from each other, becoming a very interesting thriller.
In addition to the above premise, there are several things that cannot be explained for now, which will be revealed as the game progresses.
There are different routes to follow, all excluding, which makes the choices are really meaningful for the story, not just a way of looking at different scenes.
Looking forward to the next release.

I believe if it keeps on track it will be amazing. I just feel like they need to put in more choices, episode 2 was kind of light on choices - although the episode 1 choices had a lot to do with that. There are many paths to enjoy at the start, so I'm excited to see where it goes.

This is based on Episode 2 which is still early but I am comfortable enough to give a 5-star rating. (it's not perfect because nothing is, but it's most definitely Excellent which is the 5-star rating definition)

There are quite a few adult games that tried to be more serious with mysteries or stories that aren't just your typical landlady-related story. Locked Away is one of the best ones because it focused on the actual plot while inserting sex scenes in a meaningful way.

The choice and consequences in this game seemed to be well done too. There are clear story branches that are not necessarily the right/wrong paths, but more of alternative "what if" paths. You simply get to see what would happen if you choose a different option.

The characters are also interesting with their own unique characteristics. It isn't easy to write a believable character when the story involves supernatural power, but this game definitely does it well. And to top it all off, the characters are also very beautiful.

Locked Away is without a doubt, an excellent game. Fully recommended.

I recomend this game and hopefully the dev finish this awesome game.
Overall storyline is great. Fantasy element like telepathy is there but its light. Its Not heavy fantasy.
Perhaps not for all people especially who not into fantasy theme, but hey try it! Myself not fan of fantasy themed story but i like it, and the chars is really adorable!



constructive critic :

Some change of scenery seemed too abrupt (people not even saying "bye" to each other).

polishing as such will really add immersion as story . You know like real encounter.
Trivial but adding farewell line/scene too can add more chance for you to descripting the characther trait/thought/habbit etc.

I think that relationships are progressing too fast - it's just not very realistic that people warm up so quickly with the MC, tell him their secrets and ask him for help.

this could be tricky, as immersion and depth of story vs low paced story and too much word can bore audiences.
I'd said for current state its almost enough , perhaps adding a couple of line (or scene) descripting how a grim desperation or sharp motivation that make the girls trust the MC. Same as above its can be your way to more descripting hence character/world building

I liked this game. Good renders, beautiful women, and an interesting storyline. I like video scenes and these were okay but there were some weird color/light effects in the videos. There are many different choices in the first version here (Ex. 1a) that have some impacts down the line. I haven't explored them all but it will be interesting to see those other options. Anyway, good job and I look forward to seeing more of this story.