The Hero’s Stain - part 1
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The noise of the coffee machine working almost drowned out the volume of the TV tuned to the early morning news, and the baby's whimpering in the stroller was also starting to get quite loud.
"Sarah, can you pick up your brother? I'm making pancakes here."
It was a mystery to Sarah how her mother had seen her silently enter the kitchen, standing behind her at some distance, but she smiled. Her mother always knew.
"Hi, baby," the girl leaned over to pick up the chubby baby in her arms, his fine hair as black as her own. "What do you want from your big sister today?"
The little dark eyes almost hid above the rosy cheeks when he opened that toothless smile with only two little teeth for his older sister, his tiny hands reaching out to pull a strand of hair and put it in his mouth.
"I already told you my hair isn't breakfast, Elijah," Sarah laughed, pulling back her hair and trying to distract the child. "Are you hungry?"
"I just nursed him a little while ago," her mother responded on behalf of the child who was just babbling nonsense sounds.
"Oh, you already had breakfast before everyone else, you little rascal?!" She joked, lightly tickling her brother's belly and burying her face in the fragrant folds of his soft little neck, making him laugh so heartily it could brighten Sarah's entire day.
"Ah, that sounds like music to me," the unmistakable deep voice joined the cheerful symphony of the kitchen before the tall, strong figure of her father became visible at the door. "What a delicious smell."
"Good morning, Dad," Sarah said as she received a kiss on the top of her head.
"Good morning, princess. And good morning, my big boy!"
Elijah stretched his arms towards his father, who picked him up and kissed his little head too, before heading to the stove where his mother was finishing the pancakes.
"Good morning, love," the woman turned her face, and he gave her a soft kiss on the lips. "You can sit at the table, breakfast is ready."
Samuel and Louisa Thorne were a young and attractive couple. High school sweethearts, they were surprised by a teenage pregnancy when neither of them had any means to start a family — but they did it anyway. They did receive a lot of help to not abandon their studies and to provide a good upbringing for little Sarah. Both were always very responsible and never slipped up again. They got married and only decided on having another child when they were already living comfortably, which became possible with Samuel Thorne's appointment as a Lieutenant in the Police Department — and thus, almost seventeen years later, little Elijah's arrival brightened their family's home even more.
"A police operation to investigate human trafficking reports in the countryside resulted in a shootout and three officers injured in the arrest of the perpetrators..."
"These news stories only make me more anxious every time you have to go to work," Louisa said to her husband, who was gulping down a piece of pancake with a big sip of hot coffee. The crease in his forehead formed and disappeared just as quickly, his easy smile opening up to reassure his wife.
"I'll always do everything to come back home to you all, Lou," he said lovingly, winking at Sarah, who was quietly observing them.
She didn't echo her mother's worries but, now that she was older, she understood better the dangers her father was exposed to every time he donned that uniform. She understood the luck she had every time she received a kiss on the head while she was sleeping, no matter what time he came home from work.
Her father always came back.
But she also understood when something was bothering him beyond what he tried to show. When the crease in his forehead didn't really disappear, even when the loving look while playing with Elijah or talking to her took over his expression.
And she knew that, just like her — maybe even more — her mother noticed these details, and that's why she was watching him so closely as he had his coffee that morning.
"Let's go, honey, it's time," the man called, making her gulp down the rest of her hot chocolate all at once with a start — she hadn't noticed the time passing.
"Okay, just going to grab my backpack."
Unlike many of her classmates who were embarrassed to be taken to school by their parents, Sarah felt proud to arrive in the police car that no one else bothered to look at twice, so used to it they were every day. Foo Fighters once again accompanying the short trip to school and the girl's thoughts as she had some serious issues to resolve that day.
Student council president, Sarah had discovered an error in the fundraising tally for equipment and resources for the school clubs, causing a terrible deficit that had affected many students.
"Dad," Sarah called in the middle of the chorus of
My Hero. He didn't respond, but she knew he was listening with full attention. "What would you do if you knew about a situation where some people were harmed by someone else's mistake?"
"Care to elaborate?" He laughed, a bit confused, and Sarah took a breath.
"I'm in a dilemma with the council. I discovered an error in the money count we raised for the clubs' project... And I also know who was responsible for it," Sarah sighed, upset at the reminder. "And I don't know if I can be completely transparent about this mistake and risk the council's reputation, or if I should try to solve everything internally without disclosing the details... but I know that if they find out later, it could be worse."
The man's big hands gripped the steering wheel, and he didn't say anything for a while, the crease in his forehead deepening as he thought about what to tell his daughter, who waited silently, listening attentively to the music playing.
There goes my hero
Watch him as he goes
There goes my hero
He's ordinary
"Moral dilemmas are never easy to deal with, are they?" He laughed a little, but Sarah didn't sense any humor in it. "In my view, the most correct thing to do in this situation would be to opt for transparency. It's not fair for everyone to have to pay for one person's mistake. But..." Samuel sighed, "would the person who made the mistake be harmed? Did they do it with bad intentions?"
"It wasn't in bad faith, I don't think... I hope not. But it also wasn't the first time it happened. Only this time the error was pretty big."
"Would you take the risk?" Lieutenant Thorne asked. "Of losing their trust in your leadership?"
"No," Sarah replied promptly, making her father smile.
"Then I think you already have your answer," he said as he stopped the car at the busy school entrance. Sarah unbuckled her seatbelt and leaned over to hug him, the starched uniform a mere hindrance she was already used to.
"Love you, Dad."
"Love you too, sweetheart."
"Thanks for always being my hero," she kissed his cheek, making him laugh as he understood the reference. His gaze lowered, and the crease in his forehead deepened, but he didn't fail to kiss the top of her head once more. "Take care, have a good day at work."
"See you tonight," he promised. "Good luck with your dilemma."
"Good luck with yours, too," already outside, leaning on the car window, Sarah winked, making it clear to her father how well she knew him.
She patted the car body twice and slung her backpack over her shoulder, turning to head toward the building and waving goodbye to the patrol car that had turned on the siren to get her attention — an old habit of Samuel Thorne to try and embarrass his daughter, but it only made her laugh every time.
On that sunny, warm morning, Sarah would never know that would be the last time her father would make her laugh.
